A parent blogging parody: If the Pet Shop Boys had written a song about blogging …

Blogging can be a funny old world sometimes – and one deserving of a tongue-in-cheek parody.

January is the month in which many bloggers take stock of their blogs and resolve to do something different, bigger and better.

I’ve been reflecting too, not so much because it is the start of a new year but because in exactly two weeks’ time I will celebrate the tenth anniversary of my first blog post.

If a week is a long time in politics, then a decade is an eternity in the blogosphere. When I started blogging there was no Instagram, no Pinterest, no WhatsApp and no Snapchat. Barack Obama was a little known senator from Illinois who had just that week announced his candidacy for President of the United States. And Donald Trump was best known to the American public as a property magnate and for firing people as the host of The Apprentice.

Ten years on, I’m not sure what happened to that Trump fella but I’m still going strong. Well, still going, anyway. That’s an achievement in itself, right?

The blogging world has changed a lot in that time and it continues to change. Every day there are conversations on Facebook groups, Twitter and elsewhere about Tots100 rankings, DA scores, follow/no-follow links and how to grow your followers on Instagram and Pinterest. There are always a thousand things to do, most of which any outside observer would find utterly bemusing.

So, as a reflection on the equally wonderful and barmy world of blogging, here’s my parody of the Pet Shop Boys’ bombastic 1987 chart-topper, It’s a Sin.

(Sorry, no YouTube version this time because of issues with copyright. Boo.)

On My Blog (to the tune of It’s a Sin)

When I sit down at my laptop
And start to write about my day
I know exactly what to say
I describe what my children do
It often revolves around poo
I’ll add a witty headline too

On my, on my, on my, on my blog
On my blog
Everything we’ve ever done
Everything we’ve ever said
Every place we’ve ever been
Every product’s been reviewed
On my blog

Forever writing sponsored posts
Page views? We all wanted the most
And get green lights in Yoast
Backlinks to bolster our DA
Which linky should I join today?
Chasing PRs to get paid

On my, on my, on my, on my blog
On my blog
Everything we’ve ever done
Everything we’ve ever said
Every place we’ve ever been
Every product’s been reviewed
On my blog

Monthly Tots ranking
I tried not to worry
But one month I went down
And got very angry
Grew Twitter and Facebook
And dabbled with Pinterest
Increased my Klout score
Though I don’t know how
And I still don’t understand

So I’ll sit down at my laptop
And I’ll still write about my day
But wonder what I’ll have to say
Because I want to be unique
My own book deal is what I seek
I fear my writing is too weak

On my, on my, on my, on my blog
On my blog
Everything we’ve ever done
Everything we’ve ever said
Every place we’ve ever been
Every product’s been reviewed
On my blog

And here is the original song in all its glory.

Parenting parodies

Thatcham Rhapsody (to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Toilet Trained (to the tune of Wonderwall)

Fairytale of Thatcham (to the tune of Fairytale of New York)

Kids in Cars (to the tune of Life on Mars)

Won’t You (Buy Something For Me) (to the tune of Don’t You (Forget About Me))

Pretty in Pink (to the tune of Pretty in Pink)

Vote For Me (to the tune of Let It Be)

iPhone (to the tune of Payphone)

When Stars Die (to the tune of When Doves Cry)

Parent Bloggers (to the tune of Single Ladies)

BML (to the tune of Let It Go)

Mummy Mummy Mummy (to the tune of Money Money Money)

Dinner at Maccy D’s (to the tune of Breakfast At Tiffany’s)

Halloween (to the tune of Beautiful)

Smells Like Boys’ Bedrooms (to the tune of Smells Like Teen Spirit)

Stay in Bed till Eight (to the tune of Stay Another Day)

———-

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