If Christina Aguilera had written Beautiful as a Halloween parody song …

Will you be trick-or-treating this coming Monday?

There’s no question about it, Halloween has grown in recent times to become one of the biggest commercial events on the calendar, with increasingly elaborate costumes and decorations on show as armies of kids troop from door to door as soon as darkness falls on a quest for sugary goodness.

It isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. Pre-kids we used to actively avoid it by going out for the evening, as our old neighbourhood would see the early rush of cute little children followed by a menacing army of teenagers chancing their arm.

But since we moved to a friendlier area and our kids were born, our attitude to Halloween has softened. I’m still a little bemused that a day intended to remember and honour the dead has been somewhat forgotten, instead being overtaken by a celebration of the great god of confectionery. But the kids love it. It’s the one day in the year other than Christmas when they have pretty much free rein to consume sweets. And Kara’s cat costume for this year *is* very cute.

cat-girl

Anyhow I couldn’t let this Halloween pass without penning a parody song to mark the day. This month it’s Christina Aguilera’s haunting ballad Beautiful (which I recently talked about as part of my Saturday Songs series) that is on the receiving end of the parody treatment.

Listen if you dare. But be warned that the sounds contained in this recording could be classified by those with a preference for in-tune singing as scary and horrifying. Well, it’s only fitting for Halloween, isn’t it?

Halloween (to the tune of Beautiful)

(Let’s trick or treat)

Every year it’s so wonderful
The 31st
Of October
All the kids dressed as skeletons
From door to door
Collecting more

It is Halloween
A day for ghoulish play
Carve those pumpkins out
It is Halloween
This year it’s a Monday
Yes, light those lanterns up
So bring the sugar rush today

And all the kids they’re delirious
As they eat
Too many sweets
Parents try to keep them in control
They’re feeling ill
Cos they’ve all had their fill
Wolf down the Haribo

It is Halloween
A day for ghoulish play
Carve those pumpkins out
It is Halloween
This year it’s a Monday
Yes, light those lanterns up
So bring the sugar rush today

No matter what we do
No matter what we pay
We’ll run out of pick and mix
What a terrible mistake
When all is said and done
We’ll end up drinking wine
We’ll end up, end up, end up drinking wine

It is Halloween
A day for ghoulish play
Yeah, carve those pumpkins out
It is Halloween
This year it’s a Monday
Yes, light those lanterns up
So bring the sugar rush today

Bring the sugar rush today
Bring the sugar rush today

And here is the original in all its glory.

Parenting parodies

Thatcham Rhapsody (to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Toilet Trained (to the tune of Wonderwall)

Fairytale of Thatcham (to the tune of Fairytale of New York)

Kids in Cars (to the tune of Life on Mars)

Won’t You (Buy Something For Me) (to the tune of Don’t You (Forget About Me))

Pretty in Pink (to the tune of Pretty in Pink)

Vote For Me (to the tune of Let It Be)

iPhone (to the tune of Payphone)

When Stars Die (to the tune of When Doves Cry)

Parent Bloggers (to the tune of Single Ladies)

BML (to the tune of Let It Go)

Mummy Mummy Mummy (to the tune of Money Money Money)

Dinner at Maccy D’s (to the tune of Breakfast At Tiffany’s)

———-

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