We’re just a week away from the UK’s biggest parent blogging conference, #BML16 (formerly BritMums Live). And to celebrate the event, I’ve recorded another parody song for your listening (dis)pleasure.

To be fair, anything more complex than Hickory Dickory Dock is beyond my limited vocal range – you have been warned! – but I’m still not entirely sure what possessed me to tackle Beyonce’s Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It).

It’s not because I have the moves, that’s for sure. And it’s definitely not because my voice is easily mistaken for Mrs Z’s. (It doesn’t say that on her marriage certificate, does it?)

I mean, it took me 11 goes just to get my ‘wuh uh ohs’ right. I may not be able to sing but I do take my craft seriously. Okay, no I don’t. I’d just drunk a lot of Pimm’s that night.

Anyhow, do feel free to sing along. But you might not want to do it in public.

And no amount of money or alcohol will persuade me to do a karaoke performance of this at the bar next weekend. But do feel free to buy me drinks anyway …

Parent Bloggers (to the tune of Single Ladies)

All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers
Now put your hands up

June 25, in London town
It’s BML’s fifth birthday
Making the trip, some with sponsorship
700-odd bloggers here
From SEO to videos
And the BiB Awards that evening
Unmumsy Mum to DADventurer
Who’s gonna win a prize?

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

We got Carol Smillie, at the Brewery
And a breakout on analytics
YouTube too, queues for the loo
Lindeman’s, need a drink
We talk to brand sponsors, did I mention
I’m in the Tots 100?
I made the shortlist
Top 10 Readers’ Choice
Would you maybe like to work with me?

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh

Please treat us to a full goodie bag
We like lots of good stuff
Red wine is what we prefer, what we deserve
We’ll make sure we use it then review it
And deliver it to an audience, in the bloggersphere and beyond
Meeting lots of new friends
Follow them on Twitter now
Don’t be shy, you’re not alone
Say hello or they’ll be gone

All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers (All the parent bloggers)
All the parent bloggers
Now put your hands up

Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

Cos if you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it
Don’t be mad if someone else goes and wins it
If you voted then you’ve had your own say on it

Wuh uh oh

And here is the (infinitely superior) original:

Parenting parodies

Thatcham Rhapsody (to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Toilet Trained (to the tune of Wonderwall)

Fairytale of Thatcham (to the tune of Fairytale of New York)

Kids in Cars (to the tune of Life on Mars)

Won’t You (Buy Something For Me) (to the tune of Don’t You (Forget About Me))

Pretty in Pink (to the tune of Pretty in Pink)

Vote For Me (to the tune of Let It Be)

iPhone (to the tune of Payphone)

When Stars Die (to the tune of When Doves Cry)

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